Sonnet 1
Que tengo líneas mente de amor,
escrito por la mano hombroso.
Son algo que siempre da dolor?
Se puede los borrar tiempo paso?
There's something about a different stream of thought
that passes in a language not your own
that let's you seep in something you might not
absorb in just the company of your own.
Subconscious tells me I should let him know
our love is bound so inward in my brain
that as I let the other rhythms go
new ripples trace the force behind the pain.
Mañana cantaré la canción
Que sabe, junta mente y corazón.
-Rachel Rosenberg
4 comments:
WOW!! I loved how you wrote this poem in the form of a sonnet which made it flow really well. I liked how this poem indirectly revealed a lot about you without you having to just list off facts about yourself. It was so cool that you used both Spanish and English! You speak spanish really well, so i loved how you incorporated that and could share your knowledge of the language with us. Even though i couldn't understand everything it said at first, the way you phrased everything, and the way you mixed the spanish in with the english (instead of writing the whole poem in Spanish and then just translating it to English on the side or vice versa) made it really easy to understand. I loved the originality, format, and language of this poem!! I could tell that every word was really carefully chosen. Great Job!!
I think the sonnet worked really well here. I cant really write sonnets myself so I think its really kool that you made this one. Plus i really like how you made some of it in english and some of it in spanish. I really think this poem was really well done.
Wait! What! You gypsy! You made a poem rhyme in two languages, and made it a sonnet! That is amazing! It seems as though this poem is about some kind of lover you in some Latin country whom you wooed using your spanish skills, but because he was super guapo he and had no brain he let you down and the relationship ended in one last firey ball of Latin passion. I like how I cant understand last two lines except corazon, heart and cantar, to sing, and so I put a heart full of passion and singing together and concluded that you were talking about a passionate Latino party. By the way this is awesome and mind blowing on so many levels.
Rachel, I love how you used Spanish and English in your poem. Language is such a beautiful tool and to be able and incorporate both only makes the meaning that much more beautiful. I find that this poem is very telling of its writer, and is very deep. Nice work.
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